While most articles on this website are timeless – their content remains valuable and relevant regardless of when they were written – the article below is from early 2009, written as an introduction to the then new sparklife website. As such, it contains some outdated information. I have left it here in its original form for the sake of continuity.
Hello lovely people!
Well, this website has been rather a long time coming. In fact I’ve had this domain name for well over a year now and whilst it has been used as a hub for a few other projects during that time, a relationships resource is what I’ve always intended for it; I merely wanted to make sure that I was qualified enough to really give guided advice on the subject first.
A bit of background on me:
For about two years now I have worked with one of the world-wide leading companies in terms of dating science: Love Systems, formerly known as The Mystery Method Corp (although what they are teaching now is widely evolved from what people know of the old company). They have been featured on primetime US television and in top publications. I have just returned from helping teach another bootcamp with them in London where we taught and helped a number of students to bring out their best and most attractive selves, simultaneously helping them enhance their dating lives.
As rewarding as this weekend was, I have decided to expand from working solely as a dating coach. Whilst there is a considerable amount of prestige and money in the industry and what companies like Love Systems are teaching at the moment is truly groundbreaking and helping a wealth of guys across the globe, I feel I have personally conquered all there is to achieve in the “dating science” sector of personal development and want to expand on that niche.
Where I am now:
I’ve been in a monogamous and loving relationship for nearly two years now and believe it or not, that is actually extremely rare for a dating expert. A lot of experts in the field base so much of their identity and ego on attracting new women that it becomes difficult to break loose from that persona and settle down. Those that do often find the temptation and allure of other women too much, especially with the confidence and skills to meet and attract any one of them.
This is not to insult any of the amazing, internationally-acclaimed coaches I have worked alongside, many of whom are amazingly successful and charismatic friends of mine. Contrary to what I believe, a lot of successful people believe that the pinnacle of relationship mastery is being able to happily maintain several fulfilling relationships, openly and honestly at the same time, and that is fine as long as it is done respectfully.
My own realisations have led to me having spent the last eighteen months learning EVERYTHING I can on the subject of relationships, from absorbing every relevant book I can get my hands on, to testing and experiencing what works in my own relationship.
Whereas dating science can be very structured and specific, relationship advice is a lot broader, without so many precise answers. Relationships are on the same timeline as dating, just further along, meaning there are more variables involved, such as the emotions of everyday life.
The main catalyst for me delving in to this area of personal development is to thwart the frankly terrible advice that men and women are fed, mainly through mass media and pop culture, such as glossy magazines. I frequently buy a number of both men and women’s lifestyle magazines for both entertainment value and research, and constantly find myself cringing at some of the advice and techniques they advocate towards dating and relationships.
The purpose and goals of sparklife:
The reason I have now decided to pursue and obsess myself with the understanding of relationships is partly due to the natural progression from dating coaching that I mentioned, and also so I can further enrich my own relationship. I don’t claim to always be doing everything right, but one thing I always am is AWARE. I strive to make my relationship the happiest and most fulfilling it can be for both me and my wonderful girlfriend. If you are in a relationship and not willing to do the same with yours, you have to ask yourself what the true purpose of it is!
Although I have implied that this website will be solely for relationship advice, I still love the theories surrounding meeting and connecting with other people, specifically members of the opposite sex. It would be a waste for me to ditch five years worth of exhaustive knowledge regarding dating science and social dynamics. Hence, I will frequently share my thoughts on those topics too.
As this is a relatively new medium for me, I would love you to contact me with any ideas, suggestions or questions to help make this a really useful resource for you and everyone else. I really appreciate any feedback, positive or otherwise.
The best way to contact me at the moment is via the Contact page. Also, please feel welcome to sign up for website updates below. You won’t receive any spam, only Sam! 🙂