Whilst it is comforting to think that men and women can be purely platonic friends with no hidden feelings of romance or sexual attraction, this ideal seems to consistently get discredited with real-life examples.
I’m sure most of you reading this can claim to have platonic friends of the opposite sex, but can you be certain that the feeling is completely mutual? In my experience there are only two characteristics that will allow two people to void the popular theory that men and women can never really be just friends, which I will explain shortly.
I predict that there will be many differing opinions and examples for this topic, so whilst I will share some of my own insights, I want you to share your own thoughts too…
Can men and women really be just friends?
The two characteristics that allows two people of the opposite sex to be genuine friends are people who are in completely fulfilling relationships and people with a genuine abundance mentality towards dating. Notice that these are two instances that void someone of having any form of sexual frustration.
Until I had fully developed an abundance mentality towards dating in my early twenties through years of effort and experience, I too sometimes had trouble distinguishing friendship and attraction.
On a basic level, deep friendship is similar to a romantic relationship, only without any physicality or sexual attraction. Based on this hypothesis, genuine friendship can only occur if sexual attraction is nonexistent. Both recognition of this sexual attraction and the desire for it can differ substantially between the man and the woman in question, which is where confusion or conflicting views come into play. I talked about this particular scenario in the recent article How to get out of the friend zone.
There is a great scene in the film When Harry Met Sally where Harry (played by Billy Crystal) and Sally (played by Meg Ryan) are discussing this issue of whether men and women can be just friends. The clip can be viewed below:
Please share your thoughts:
Based on what I have written, do you think men and women can happily be just friends? Do you have examples of this theory working or not working in your own life? 🙂