Many relationship experts talk about respect in relationships, but it is not something that exists with the flick of a switch. Respect from your partner is something that you earn over time. It is the key to building true friendships and also the key to building a solid, long-lasting relationship! It may take a while to build a solid foundation of respect but it only takes a minute to lose it all. The following list contains ten ways to earn your partner’s respect…
1.) Have strong boundaries:
Early in a relationship, it is important to clearly identify how you want to be treated and define what behaviour is acceptable and what is unacceptable. You don’t need to be ruthless with your values or constantly say them out loud, but the moment you let your partner disrespect or manipulate you even once, is when you start to lose respect. The same applies in reverse. You should be willing to respect your partner’s boundaries even if they differ from yours.
2.) Allow your partner to earn your respect:
Respect is a shared quality in a fulfilling relationship. It is actually beneficial to the relationship as a whole if you allow your partner to earn your respect rather than offer it unconditionally. Humans are more willing to work at something if it isn’t a free pass. In a relationship this means you both know that respect is a two way system. It requires effort from both of you to exist.
This does not mean that there should be no leeway regarding inconsequential things. If the core intentions are always that of mutual trustworthiness and respect, lovingly discussing and resolving an issue together actually strengthens respect.
3.) Be honest:
Honesty is always the best policy in a relationship, regardless of any supposed best interests for your partner. If you are always one-hundred percent honest, your partner will find it far easier to trust you.
One of the hardest things for someone to overcome if their partner has been unfaithful in any way is how to trust their partner again, which is a perfectly legitimate feeling.
As long as you are always honest, even with seemingly trivial things then you will always have your partner’s respect in this department.
4.) Be authentic:
Being authentic means being true to your core values, beliefs and aspirations. It is an extremely admirable thing in a partner and is useful on many levels.
Don’t be afraid to disagree with your partner; it’s actually healthy as long as it is done in a respectful manner, calmly and politely.
You should also never feel the need to change your beliefs, values, sense of humour or bend the truth to either please your partner or win them over. Having integrity is something your partner will respect, even if they disagree on the details.
5.) Keep your word:
A surefire way to slowly lose your partner’s respect is to be unreliable or flaky. Even small things such as promising to do chores around the house and not doing so, or standing them up on some arrangements without valid reasons will count against how much respect your partner has for you.
This also works on a larger scale too regarding long-term goals and ambitions. An authentic and powerful person is resolute towards achieving their ultimate purpose in life and any goals along the way. Refusing to back down in that life quest will gain a wealth of respect from your partner, however successful you are currently and however many setbacks you have along the way.
6.) Give praise when it is deserved:
Make an effort to notice all the positive things your partner does for you. Being sincerely grateful for these things and praising your partner whenever relevant will enrich your relationship dramatically. If you limit your sincere praise for times when you partner truly deserves it, you will not only help your partner to be their best self but you will also have all their respect and admiration.
7.) You are never overly jealous:
Most people have experienced jealousy at some point in their life, so most people can also empathise when their partner is getting jealous. Even so, an experienced and confident person can use certain techniques to control feelings of jealousy and fully trust their partner.
8.) Be self-reliant:
Without becoming too preachy, no one can change your life apart from you! People who live their life through their partner or carelessly depend on their partner to guide their choices will start to become a burden over time.
You can ask for favours and advice from your partner just like you would from any other friend, but it should always be a request for support rather than a request for approval or control.
9.) Resist becoming changeable or complacent:
As a relationship progresses, it is common for couples to become complacent or negligent, especially regarding how much effort they put towards remaining attractive and interested.
As long as you don’t make obvious sudden changes in character or think “my partner will stay with me no matter what I do” then it will be clear to your partner that you care about how they perceive you.
10.) Be well-rounded:
This last point intends to encompass the majority of the other points. Being well-rounded, having an open-mind and looking for solutions in life will always have a positive influence on how much respect you receive. As long as you strive to be the best person and ultimately the best boyfriend or girlfriend you can be whilst constantly trying to improve on any areas of weakness, you will always have your partner’s respect. 🙂