In the conclusion to the article The ONLY way to prevent your partner cheating, I talked about being the best boyfriend or girlfriend possible. Below is a list of ten attributes that can help you be the best boyfriend or girlfriend possible…
1.) Lead an attractive lifestyle:
An attractive lifestyle is something you should be constantly trying to optimise if you want to live a happy and fulfilling life. The more happy and fulfilling your own life is, the more happy and fulfilling your partner’s will be. Emotions are contagious!
There is a common piece of dating advice that says “bring them into your world” and it definitely applies to long-term relationships too. Humans are creatures of habit and routine. There is nothing more exciting than being incorporated into an exciting and new attractive lifestyle.
An attractive lifestyle is made up of many aspects: having a healthy social life with lots of interesting people in it; having exciting hobbies; creating opportunities such as travelling and adventure. All are wonderful things to be able to share with someone special.
2.) Have ambition:
There aren’t many things in a relationship more deflating than having a partner who mopes about with no aspirations, passions or goals. One of humankind’s greatest needs is to have a sense of purpose. It is far harder to grow and develop yourself if you are with someone who is content being stuck in the same old routine for the rest of their life.
Even if certain ambitions are merely distant dreams and you are currently in a mundane job just to pay the bills, having aspirations and talking about them with passion will inspire your partner and make both of you more likely to achieve them in the long run.
3.) Access to resources:
I’m not talking about being filthy rich here or being able to completely financially support your partner but having a certain degree of independence is important in a relationship so that your partner never sees you as a burden.
Security is the foundation of many relationships and knowing that you will never be out of a home or desirable luxuries is extremely reassuring for your partner.
4.) Have high standards:
I’ve talked many times before about having standards in a relationship in order to keep it healthy. The article How to get through bad patches in a relationship is one article where I discuss the topic.
It seems counter-intuitive to think that your partner would want you to impose high standards on them but it actually says a lot about your character and your commitment to the relationship to always want to keep it as fulfilling as possible. Your partner probably doesn’t want to become complacent or let their lifestyle deteriorate, which is a lot easier to achieve if you are always encouraging and inspiring them to be their best self.
5.) Display attractive traits:
This is another common factor that leads to couples becoming complacent and relationships becoming stagnant. Remember the key factors that your partner was attracted to when you first met each other and strive to be the ultimate evolved version of that person, rather than the antithesis of it.
Confidence is attractive whatever stage of a relationship you are in so always try to display these characteristics. Other attractive traits that keep a relationship fresh are playfully teasing your partner and maintaining a level of unpredictable behaviour, as long as it isn’t harmful.
6.) Make sure your partner is sexually satisfied:
Another common cause of relationship dissatisfaction is a monotonous or non-existent sex life. If you want to be the best partner you can be then make sure your partner is always being sexually satisfied, including things such as sexual fantasies and new sexual experiences.
Allow your partner to open up and talk freely about these subjects. Far too many people find these topics awkward or embarrassing to talk about in detail but they really shouldn’t be between an intimate couple.
7.) Listen to your partner intently:
Make uninterrupted time for your partner, especially if they are in a time of need.
If you have a busy schedule or if your mind is on other things, try not to resort to multitasking and giving your partner only a portion of your attention. Find a time later when you are not so busy and you can give them your FULL attention. An act like this does not go unnoticed!
As I predominantly work from home, this is a common occurrence with me. I always make sure if I have neglected Heidi at some point throughout the day that she will have my undivided attention later on, where I can take in every word she is saying with full interest.
8.) Be supportive:
At different times throughout a relationship, each partner will require more or less support from the other, be it emotional support or simply taking more of an interest in your partner’s activities and own interests. Knowing you are there for them and that you are actively interested will definitely enrich the relationship.
9.) Be thoughtful:
Most people do think about their partners a considerable amount but that does not automatically mean that they are thoughtful.
It’s the little things that count so much in a relationship. Remembering something they liked and then surprising them with it at a later date, or making them something creative and memorable both show exceptional thoughtfulness. Basically, doing anything that says to your partner, “I was thinking of you” is wonderful.
10.) Be loving:
The ultimate way to be the best boyfriend or girlfriend is to be loving towards your partner. If all else fails, if you are loving then your partner will know that you truly care. With this, most other relationship problems or obstacles can be overcome or worked through. 🙂