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	<title>Comments on: Sleeping with someone new for the first time</title>
	<atom:link href="http://sparklife.info/blog/2009/11/sleeping-with-someone-first-time/feed/" rel="self" type="application/rss+xml" />
	<link>http://sparklife.info/blog/2009/11/sleeping-with-someone-first-time/</link>
	<description>Relationship and Dating Advice</description>
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		<title>By: Anderson</title>
		<link>http://sparklife.info/blog/2009/11/sleeping-with-someone-first-time/#comment-3277</link>
		<dc:creator>Anderson</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Sun, 29 Nov 2009 23:35:32 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://sparklife.info/blog/?p=538#comment-3277</guid>
		<description>I meant better to be open to your partner...</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I meant better to be open to your partner&#8230;</p>
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		<title>By: Samuel McCrohan</title>
		<link>http://sparklife.info/blog/2009/11/sleeping-with-someone-first-time/#comment-3252</link>
		<dc:creator>Samuel McCrohan</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Thu, 19 Nov 2009 19:35:05 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://sparklife.info/blog/?p=538#comment-3252</guid>
		<description>Correct me if I’m wrong but doesn’t being ‘open about how you feel’ contradict the premise of a ‘discrete dating site’? :)</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Correct me if I’m wrong but doesn’t being ‘open about how you feel’ contradict the premise of a ‘discrete dating site’? <img src='http://sparklife.info/blog/wp-includes/images/smilies/icon_smile.gif' alt=':)' class='wp-smiley' /> </p>
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	<item>
		<title>By: Anderson</title>
		<link>http://sparklife.info/blog/2009/11/sleeping-with-someone-first-time/#comment-3235</link>
		<dc:creator>Anderson</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Mon, 16 Nov 2009 00:19:50 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://sparklife.info/blog/?p=538#comment-3235</guid>
		<description>It is better to be open about how you feel and it will be smooth sailing...
Discrete dating site for those married , or in a relationship,
and looking for discreet married dating.
marriedandlooking.co.uk</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>It is better to be open about how you feel and it will be smooth sailing&#8230;<br />
Discrete dating site for those married , or in a relationship,<br />
and looking for discreet married dating.<br />
marriedandlooking.co.uk</p>
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	<item>
		<title>By: Samuel McCrohan</title>
		<link>http://sparklife.info/blog/2009/11/sleeping-with-someone-first-time/#comment-3230</link>
		<dc:creator>Samuel McCrohan</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Thu, 12 Nov 2009 12:39:33 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://sparklife.info/blog/?p=538#comment-3230</guid>
		<description>In that case maybe I’ll turn up to my next date doing cartwheels, with three pairs of socks stuffed down my pants, wearing a t-shirt that says ‘Sex God’ on it!! :)

Your insight does go to show how much more thorough women are with these things than men though. I can normally tell if a woman will be good in bed by default within about ten minutes of meeting her... and most men know if a woman is ‘good enough’ in bed within about ten seconds!! :)

Sam</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>In that case maybe I’ll turn up to my next date doing cartwheels, with three pairs of socks stuffed down my pants, wearing a t-shirt that says ‘Sex God’ on it!! <img src='http://sparklife.info/blog/wp-includes/images/smilies/icon_smile.gif' alt=':)' class='wp-smiley' /> </p>
<p>Your insight does go to show how much more thorough women are with these things than men though. I can normally tell if a woman will be good in bed by default within about ten minutes of meeting her&#8230; and most men know if a woman is ‘good enough’ in bed within about ten seconds!! <img src='http://sparklife.info/blog/wp-includes/images/smilies/icon_smile.gif' alt=':)' class='wp-smiley' /> </p>
<p>Sam</p>
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	<item>
		<title>By: CB</title>
		<link>http://sparklife.info/blog/2009/11/sleeping-with-someone-first-time/#comment-3226</link>
		<dc:creator>CB</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 11 Nov 2009 21:05:56 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://sparklife.info/blog/?p=538#comment-3226</guid>
		<description>A woman&#039;s insight:

The three-date rule is so that we can decide whether or not we think you&#039;ll be good in bed. We like quality, not quantity;)</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>A woman&#8217;s insight:</p>
<p>The three-date rule is so that we can decide whether or not we think you&#8217;ll be good in bed. We like quality, not quantity;)</p>
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		<title>By: Samuel McCrohan</title>
		<link>http://sparklife.info/blog/2009/11/sleeping-with-someone-first-time/#comment-3225</link>
		<dc:creator>Samuel McCrohan</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 11 Nov 2009 20:16:55 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://sparklife.info/blog/?p=538#comment-3225</guid>
		<description>Hello,

I like that method. I often hear from people who don’t know where they stand because they assume sex automatically brings relationship status with it. And you’re right... Sex definitely gets better the more you do it with the same person!

Thanks a lot for commenting, :)

Sam</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Hello,</p>
<p>I like that method. I often hear from people who don’t know where they stand because they assume sex automatically brings relationship status with it. And you’re right&#8230; Sex definitely gets better the more you do it with the same person!</p>
<p>Thanks a lot for commenting, <img src='http://sparklife.info/blog/wp-includes/images/smilies/icon_smile.gif' alt=':)' class='wp-smiley' /> </p>
<p>Sam</p>
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		<title>By: Samuel McCrohan</title>
		<link>http://sparklife.info/blog/2009/11/sleeping-with-someone-first-time/#comment-3224</link>
		<dc:creator>Samuel McCrohan</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 11 Nov 2009 20:15:09 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://sparklife.info/blog/?p=538#comment-3224</guid>
		<description>Hey Dean, thanks for checking back so regularly and commenting! :)

Yes I know it can sometimes feel awkward when getting physical with a new woman for the first time. That is largely down to how smoothly you have escalated physically. If you increase seduction slowly from touching to kissing etc then you get to the point where sex is the next natural step.

I would generally advise against verbalising this seduction (unless you’ve spoken to each other about having sex before) as it puts the woman into the pressurised situation of having to logically decide whether to have sex or not in the moment. She will have done this already in her subconscious mind but sex is a lot more enjoyable for both sexes when it can be rationalised as natural and spontaneous.

Thanks for answering the questions too. Sex with someone new can seem ‘clumsy’ as you have to figure out what each other likes and dislikes. Both men and women can feel it is too soon for sex but as I stated in the article, women receive a lot harsher stereotypes when it comes to sex, which plays a part as to why they may seem to want to wait longer.

Thanks for your comment, :)

Sam</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Hey Dean, thanks for checking back so regularly and commenting! <img src='http://sparklife.info/blog/wp-includes/images/smilies/icon_smile.gif' alt=':)' class='wp-smiley' /> </p>
<p>Yes I know it can sometimes feel awkward when getting physical with a new woman for the first time. That is largely down to how smoothly you have escalated physically. If you increase seduction slowly from touching to kissing etc then you get to the point where sex is the next natural step.</p>
<p>I would generally advise against verbalising this seduction (unless you’ve spoken to each other about having sex before) as it puts the woman into the pressurised situation of having to logically decide whether to have sex or not in the moment. She will have done this already in her subconscious mind but sex is a lot more enjoyable for both sexes when it can be rationalised as natural and spontaneous.</p>
<p>Thanks for answering the questions too. Sex with someone new can seem ‘clumsy’ as you have to figure out what each other likes and dislikes. Both men and women can feel it is too soon for sex but as I stated in the article, women receive a lot harsher stereotypes when it comes to sex, which plays a part as to why they may seem to want to wait longer.</p>
<p>Thanks for your comment, <img src='http://sparklife.info/blog/wp-includes/images/smilies/icon_smile.gif' alt=':)' class='wp-smiley' /> </p>
<p>Sam</p>
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		<title>By: Samuel McCrohan</title>
		<link>http://sparklife.info/blog/2009/11/sleeping-with-someone-first-time/#comment-3223</link>
		<dc:creator>Samuel McCrohan</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 11 Nov 2009 20:13:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://sparklife.info/blog/?p=538#comment-3223</guid>
		<description>Hello,

It is hard for me to personally relate to your situation as I am not religious myself, although I did briefly date a religious woman with similar views to you many years ago. She actually changed her beliefs whilst she was with me so I imagine every Christian’s beliefs vary in strictness.

I can imagine that it would be hard to find guys without the same religious beliefs as you who are willing to wait until marriage but I am sure sticking to your beliefs is more important so good on you for doing so.

In a sense, waiting until marriage before having sex is just an extreme version of some of the points I was talking about in the above article, namely respecting a woman’s disposition towards sex and the levels of trust and commitment required before sex.

I’m not sure what your personal boundaries of intimacy would be with a man prior to marriage but I’m sure there are plenty of guys out there who will respect them, regardless of their own religious stance.

Thanks for your question, :)

Sam</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Hello,</p>
<p>It is hard for me to personally relate to your situation as I am not religious myself, although I did briefly date a religious woman with similar views to you many years ago. She actually changed her beliefs whilst she was with me so I imagine every Christian’s beliefs vary in strictness.</p>
<p>I can imagine that it would be hard to find guys without the same religious beliefs as you who are willing to wait until marriage but I am sure sticking to your beliefs is more important so good on you for doing so.</p>
<p>In a sense, waiting until marriage before having sex is just an extreme version of some of the points I was talking about in the above article, namely respecting a woman’s disposition towards sex and the levels of trust and commitment required before sex.</p>
<p>I’m not sure what your personal boundaries of intimacy would be with a man prior to marriage but I’m sure there are plenty of guys out there who will respect them, regardless of their own religious stance.</p>
<p>Thanks for your question, <img src='http://sparklife.info/blog/wp-includes/images/smilies/icon_smile.gif' alt=':)' class='wp-smiley' /> </p>
<p>Sam</p>
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		<title>By: starsparkle</title>
		<link>http://sparklife.info/blog/2009/11/sleeping-with-someone-first-time/#comment-3222</link>
		<dc:creator>starsparkle</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 11 Nov 2009 17:25:41 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://sparklife.info/blog/?p=538#comment-3222</guid>
		<description>After we had sex for the first time I officially asked my boyfriend out (though later he said he was surprised as he&#039;d assumed the date was an indication that we were going out!) and he said &quot;oh good, you get to understand that I&#039;m only going to get better at doing that&quot;... which is entirely true!

First time is a run-through. :P Which is why promiscuous sex would never be enjoyable for me. Woop de doo you have a bunch of moves that worked on the other girls... they&#039;re unlikely to work on me!!</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>After we had sex for the first time I officially asked my boyfriend out (though later he said he was surprised as he&#8217;d assumed the date was an indication that we were going out!) and he said &#8220;oh good, you get to understand that I&#8217;m only going to get better at doing that&#8221;&#8230; which is entirely true!</p>
<p>First time is a run-through. <img src='http://sparklife.info/blog/wp-includes/images/smilies/icon_razz.gif' alt=':P' class='wp-smiley' />  Which is why promiscuous sex would never be enjoyable for me. Woop de doo you have a bunch of moves that worked on the other girls&#8230; they&#8217;re unlikely to work on me!!</p>
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		<title>By: dean</title>
		<link>http://sparklife.info/blog/2009/11/sleeping-with-someone-first-time/#comment-3221</link>
		<dc:creator>dean</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 11 Nov 2009 17:02:17 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://sparklife.info/blog/?p=538#comment-3221</guid>
		<description>Got in to a bit of a habit of commenting on your blog now ha! It’s one of only 3 that I regularly check so thanks for always putting out awesome content!
I can relate to a lot of the things you wrote in this post. I always find it really awkward when first getting physical with a woman and knowing whether to go all the way yet or not. It’s not like you should ask is it?
To answer your question at the end, to me it’s a sense of excitement and relief when I finally have sex with someone I like although its always rather clumsy sex. I’ve never thought it was too soon but then I assume that part is just for women? Don’t know why that is though.
Cheers</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Got in to a bit of a habit of commenting on your blog now ha! It’s one of only 3 that I regularly check so thanks for always putting out awesome content!<br />
I can relate to a lot of the things you wrote in this post. I always find it really awkward when first getting physical with a woman and knowing whether to go all the way yet or not. It’s not like you should ask is it?<br />
To answer your question at the end, to me it’s a sense of excitement and relief when I finally have sex with someone I like although its always rather clumsy sex. I’ve never thought it was too soon but then I assume that part is just for women? Don’t know why that is though.<br />
Cheers</p>
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