Comments on: A fundamental flaw in dating and why you should never stop meeting people http://sparklife.info/blog/2009/10/fundamental-flaw-dating-meeting-people/ Relationship and Dating Advice Wed, 08 Sep 2010 00:49:08 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.0.1 By: Samuel McCrohan http://sparklife.info/blog/2009/10/fundamental-flaw-dating-meeting-people/#comment-3177 Samuel McCrohan Mon, 26 Oct 2009 00:05:14 +0000 http://sparklife.info/blog/?p=498#comment-3177 Hi Elena, Yes I think everyone knows someone who has changed because they have got into a serious relationship. It’s inevitable to change in some aspects because obviously personal feelings and life situation immediately transition. It’s when people forget the very things that brought them together with their partner that it has an adverse effect though. The most astonishing situation (and I know many cases like this in real life) is when a partner actively restricts their partner’s social life (being jealous if they go to a party on their own or out with their friends for example) and then wonder why their partner changes after being conditioned this way over time! What you say at the end of your comment is wonderful... Relationships are great and love is the most powerful emotion in the world... but there’s a lot more to who you are than those two things! I’ll leave it at that as you summed it up perfectly yourself. :) Thanks for your insights Elena, Sam Hi Elena,

Yes I think everyone knows someone who has changed because they have got into a serious relationship. It’s inevitable to change in some aspects because obviously personal feelings and life situation immediately transition. It’s when people forget the very things that brought them together with their partner that it has an adverse effect though.

The most astonishing situation (and I know many cases like this in real life) is when a partner actively restricts their partner’s social life (being jealous if they go to a party on their own or out with their friends for example) and then wonder why their partner changes after being conditioned this way over time!

What you say at the end of your comment is wonderful… Relationships are great and love is the most powerful emotion in the world… but there’s a lot more to who you are than those two things! I’ll leave it at that as you summed it up perfectly yourself. :)

Thanks for your insights Elena,

Sam

]]> By: Elena http://sparklife.info/blog/2009/10/fundamental-flaw-dating-meeting-people/#comment-3176 Elena Sat, 24 Oct 2009 23:06:59 +0000 http://sparklife.info/blog/?p=498#comment-3176 Very well said. I couldn't agree more. That's a great attitude to have. I've had friends who have changed because they have finally found that special someone. It's their choice I guess. You give some useful tips Sam. So many times, I thought I met someone special, and then find out that he's really not interested. I think you can come across as most attractive when you're living life to the fullest and not losing sight of who you are just because a potential mate is giving you the time of day for the moment. People can make our lives richer, and if you love people, that's part of who you are. No one should limit that part of who you are when they truly love you. Very well said. I couldn’t agree more. That’s a great attitude to have. I’ve had friends who have changed because they have finally found that special someone. It’s their choice I guess. You give some useful tips Sam. So many times, I thought I met someone special, and then find out that he’s really not interested. I think you can come across as most attractive when you’re living life to the fullest and not losing sight of who you are just because a potential mate is giving you the time of day for the moment. People can make our lives richer, and if you love people, that’s part of who you are. No one should limit that part of who you are when they truly love you.

]]> By: Samuel McCrohan http://sparklife.info/blog/2009/10/fundamental-flaw-dating-meeting-people/#comment-3175 Samuel McCrohan Thu, 22 Oct 2009 19:37:45 +0000 http://sparklife.info/blog/?p=498#comment-3175 Hi Dean, That’s fine; ask any questions you want, I’m happy to answer them. You can either e-mail them to me or write them here and I will reply. Thanks for your comment; I’m glad you got a lot out of this article. :) Sam Hi Dean,

That’s fine; ask any questions you want, I’m happy to answer them. You can either e-mail them to me or write them here and I will reply.

Thanks for your comment; I’m glad you got a lot out of this article. :)

Sam

]]> By: Samuel McCrohan http://sparklife.info/blog/2009/10/fundamental-flaw-dating-meeting-people/#comment-3174 Samuel McCrohan Thu, 22 Oct 2009 19:36:45 +0000 http://sparklife.info/blog/?p=498#comment-3174 Hi John, That’s correct that it means you have options when you get out of a relationship, although more from a psychological stance than a literal one. It also helps to keep your relationship in perspective by knowing that if things aren’t working out or you aren’t happy in the relationship, you can move on. Whilst you don’t want to be thinking of any of the people you meet as ‘backup options’, having a strong social circle reassures you that it IS easy to meet people and start dating again if you are single. Thanks for your comment, Sam Hi John,

That’s correct that it means you have options when you get out of a relationship, although more from a psychological stance than a literal one. It also helps to keep your relationship in perspective by knowing that if things aren’t working out or you aren’t happy in the relationship, you can move on.

Whilst you don’t want to be thinking of any of the people you meet as ‘backup options’, having a strong social circle reassures you that it IS easy to meet people and start dating again if you are single.

Thanks for your comment,

Sam

]]> By: dean http://sparklife.info/blog/2009/10/fundamental-flaw-dating-meeting-people/#comment-3173 dean Thu, 22 Oct 2009 01:37:40 +0000 http://sparklife.info/blog/?p=498#comment-3173 Great writeup mate - I got a lot out of this one! Cheers Got a couple of extra questions but my comp is about to pack up so I'll have to ask them later if thats cool. Great writeup mate – I got a lot out of this one! Cheers
Got a couple of extra questions but my comp is about to pack up so I’ll have to ask them later if thats cool.

]]> By: John Santos http://sparklife.info/blog/2009/10/fundamental-flaw-dating-meeting-people/#comment-3171 John Santos Wed, 21 Oct 2009 20:58:55 +0000 http://sparklife.info/blog/?p=498#comment-3171 "One of the saddest aspects of relationships is that they can turn even the most attractive person into their antithesis over time. Have you ever had a friend who has suddenly disappeared off the face of the earth after getting into a serious relationship? Or, have you ever come out of a long relationship only to feel clueless as to how to succeed in the dating world again?" So true. I've always thought of myself as oretty good with the ladies but the two longterm relationships I've had (both 4 years) I took my social skills for granted, got in a rut and was utterly clueless when I was back on the market. I guess aswell as keepiung you attractive it also means you have options when your single again. “One of the saddest aspects of relationships is that they can turn even the most attractive person into their antithesis over time. Have you ever had a friend who has suddenly disappeared off the face of the earth after getting into a serious relationship? Or, have you ever come out of a long relationship only to feel clueless as to how to succeed in the dating world again?”

So true. I’ve always thought of myself as oretty good with the ladies but the two longterm relationships I’ve had (both 4 years) I took my social skills for granted, got in a rut and was utterly clueless when I was back on the market. I guess aswell as keepiung you attractive it also means you have options when your single again.

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