The situation you describe is a fairly common one. It is usually a culmination of several different factors that results in a woman feeling slightly “trapped” in a relationship.

The best thing to do in such a situation is to carry on working on being attractive and loving but not being quite as intense or available as before. The foundations of the relationship are clearly still there so it simply a case of changing some of the overlying dynamics to get it back on track. The ten points above will definitely help with that.

Trust is arguably the most important aspect of any relationship, so it is a great point to mention.

The thing about trust in the context of this article is that it is more of an outcome than a process. What I mean by that is that trust comes from working on other aspects of personal development such as self-esteem, rationality and influence. It is not something that someone can decide to incorporate into their relationship without working on those other aspects.

Whilst it may seem like there are many different levels of trust, ultimately it is a binary attribute… you either trust someone or you do not! The funny thing is that the most important person to learn to trust is yourself. Once you reach that point, someone questioning your partner’s trustworthiness is merely “food for thought” rather than instantaneous fact or fiction. You can let those thoughts enter your mind but you don’t have to let them affect your mind!

Thanks a lot for reading and commenting,

Sam

Another one you could add would be:
Trust. Always trust your partner. It is easy enough to say you do, but the question is, if someone was to say that your partner had done something. Would you allow that thought into your mind?

Thank you for your time Sam

Jordan H

Although your boyfriend is important in the process, a lot of the issues you describe can be resolved via personal development, rather than changing specific things in your relationship. The first two points in the above article are the most relevant in this respect.

Something such as inquiring about whom your boyfriend is texting can easily come across as suspicious or needy… but it can equally come across as genuine interest. You obviously want to convey the latter, which is dependent on subtle differences in your tonality and body-language.

Gaining some confidence across the areas you mention will naturally help you to project the ideal mindset. I know making friends in a new city can seem daunting but if you are proactive about it, it doesn’t have to be such a slow process. Joining clubs and attending events of interest is an easy way to get the ball rolling in that department.

One way to combine the two is to start taking an active interest in your boyfriend’s social circles and befriend some of his peers. This should obviously be done without any signs of neediness as mentioned.

If you know something is potentially harmful to your relationship, then the way to be a great boyfriend is to do whatever it takes to prevent doing that thing, whilst simultaneously taking steps to alleviate the causes of the inciting feelings.

All the best and thanks for writing,

Sam

From what you have written, it sounds like number one on the above list is definitely the first thing to focus on.

You want to create an attractive lifestyle that your lady wants to be a part of and that draws her in. An added benefit of working on your lifestyle like this is that you won’t be so preoccupied with what she is thinking and how to win her over as everything should fall into place naturally.

What exactly constitutes an attractive lifestyle will differ slightly for everyone but the three main areas to work on are health (both mental and physical), wealth (not necessarily financial but more referring to confidence and gratitude) and relationships (social life and heightening your attractive side).

There are loads of ways to work on each of those categories and along with keeping the other points from the article in mind, they should help completely refresh your relationship and how your girlfriend perceives the two of you.

Take care,

Sam

Those romantic gestures sound awesome and any devoted women would love and appreciate any man who does stuff like that. The key though is moderation and sincerity. Certain aspects of your relationship do sound one-sided. This goes for the romantic gestures, how much you ‘provide’ for each other and also your sex life.

If your girlfriend has had bad experiences in the past (you mention her last partner abused her) then you do want to be careful and really pay attention to how she reacts to certain things, especially regarding sex and intimacy.

If a woman thinks that all you want is sex then something is going wrong in the way you are conveying your interest. A relationship should not be an exchange of gifts in return for sex. I know that is not your intention but if your girlfriend is interpreting it like that then her behaviour is understandable.

Carry on giving gifts when you want to and solely because you want to. Sex should be a result of mutual attraction, respect and dominance but it should never be assumed. The spontaneity and smooth physical escalation seems to be what your girlfriend misses. If you try and make it all about her pleasure the next time you initiate sex yet still be leading the physical escalation, then her reaction should be more positive.

Thanks for reading the website,

Sam

I’m not sure exactly what you are getting at but I agree that being yourself is ideal. The thing to ensure though is that it is the ‘best’ version of yourself that you are conveying and that is especially true if you want to be a great girlfriend or boyfriend.

Also, please send me a batch of Vanilla Coke… It was discontinued here in England several years ago and I remember it being delicious!

Sam

and if you say “someone said the exact same thing in a previous comment” or something around those lines, I AINT INTERESTED IN WHAT OTHERS MIGHT HAVTA SAY ATM!!! GOT IT!?!?!

Thankyou and be warned… im worse then this. This is my “I’m annoyed but drinking Vanilla Coke” speech….. So HEADS UP GUENIUSES