Lying in a relationship

Humans are social creatures and as a side effect we have developed several hard-wired survival techniques. The ability to lie is one of those, although that is not to say that it is the best technique to succeed in modern society, let alone relationships!

I was recently interviewed by an online publication on ‘the benefits of lying in relationships’ (a loaded title if ever there was one) but it did get me thinking intently about why couples really lie to each other. The truth is that however honest a couple say they are there is always going to be one or two things that can be construed as dishonest by the other person. The question is where do trivial lies cross over into damaging lies?

This article will explain the different types of lying, the reasons why people lie in relationships and then discuss some pressing consequences surrounding these… 🙂

The different types of lying:

There are three main types of lie, each varying in intensity, and what is right and wrong for you will largely be based on your own moral upbringing and development.

The three main types of lie in a relationship are: Read more

Using Kegel exercises to improve sexual performance

I have had several requests by readers that it is about time I wrote another article on a more sexual topic, so I have chosen to write on the topic of Kegel exercises. Kegel exercises are something that you may never have heard of before and a lot of people who are already aware of them severely underrate the incredible effect they can have on one’s sex life.

This article will give a brief background as to what Kegel exercises are before describing how they can improve sexual performance and then most importantly, detailing how to do the exercises for yourself… 🙂

What are Kegel exercises?

Kegel exercises were developed by an American gynaecologist called Dr. Arthur Kegel in the mid twentieth century. They are a method of strengthening the Pubococcygeus muscles (commonly referred to as the PC muscles) that are situated on the pelvic floor just below both the female and male genitalia. They were originally developed to aid pregnant women in having more physical control immediately before, during and after pregnancy but in recent years their effect on sexual fulfilment has also been keenly researched. Read more

Topics to avoid with your girlfriend or boyfriend

I always advocate relationships that are fully open and trusting, regardless of how serious or monogamous they are. However, there are some topics that will do your relationship no favours by being discussed in intricate detail, especially in the initial stages of dating and connecting.

A lot of a relationship’s success is based upon the effort each person makes on their own personal development. Things such as jealousy, arguments and the number one relationship killer are all based on insecurities that are individual and not that of a couple. Whilst I repeat the sentiment that relationships should be fully open and trusting, there is a big difference between sharing your insecurities with your partner and expecting them to ‘fix you’, as opposed to being responsible for your own personal development.

So to expand this article’s title to a less pithy but more accurate version, below are a couple of topics that you should avoid detailing or enquiring to unnecessary and inconsiderate depths with you partner… 🙂 Read more

Approach a woman and fall in love – The story of how I met Heidi

This is the story of how I met my wonderful girlfriend Heidi, almost three years ago. The story is told first from my perspective and then followed by Heidi’s own version of events… 🙂

Sam on the approach:

It was a typically balmy afternoon in Devon, South England and I was doing what British students do best during a weekday afternoon… loitering in town! 🙂

On my inversely gargantuan ‘to do list’ was the mundane task of purchasing a plain white t-shirt for an upcoming break-dancing performance, yet I was in a particularly excitable mood that afternoon… My degree was coming to an end and my leap into the big, scary real-world was imminent! 🙂

At this stage in my life, I was already very good at approaching and attracting women in bars and clubs and was already getting substantial work and seminar slots as a dating coach in London. Even so, you’re only good at what you know… and meeting women in less social environments such as the daytime was something I hadn’t put too much thought to at the time.

My excitable mood on that fateful Tuesday was heightened further on entering Primark (a cheap and cheerful English clothes shop) and seeing two attractive female friends of mine from the University. They were excited to see me and belted towards me to give me a rapturous hug… Little did I know at the time that this would play an unintentionally effective part in what was about to be a big moment in my life! Read more

The number one relationship killer

Many problems within relationships can be solved with only a small amount of awareness and action. Things such as jealousy, lack of trust or arguments (all topics I have covered on this website previously; please check the archives) are either self-imposed psychological defects or temporary blips in an otherwise fulfilling relationship.

There is one facet in a relationship that once fully developed is very hard to overcome though… It is the main cause for the breakdown of relationships of several years or more and is also very subtle in its evolvement.

The number one relationship killer that I am referring to is Read more